Big Smiles....

From Mommy and Zachary...........

Because of Zach's apraxia, he has always had a hard time moving his mouth - making it into certain shapes, at times not being to open very big, not being able to move his tongue to the side or sticking it out.

Until last week anytime you asked Zach for a kiss he would come up to you and lean is head on your face or shoulder. His kiss was more of a hug (still special, but just not the same) - it was very rare that you would ever get an open mouth slobbery kiss that all infants give, in fact I can only think of one or two times Zachary gave me a real baby-like kiss.

This all changed last week when somehow, sometime, Zach realized he could get his mouth to pucker up, kissing noise and all. I was very happy when I got my first kiss from him last week, but disappointed when he could only do it once and then he struggled, as he struggles with so many things.

Yesterday, however was a completely different story -- I pushed for those kisses, begging and pleading, bribing him for a kiss that I've so longed to have from my son. Showing him myself "see mommy does it this way" I'm sure looking like a fool as I'm kissing the air and then his cheek.

I know how cheesy this must sound to some of you who are able to take those slobbery kisses for granted, I mean I know every parent longs for the first kiss from their child but after they've experienced once - it becomes no longer a big deal, because they know their child can do it - don't get me wrong I still remember the kisses Zoe gave me and I still remember loving getting them, but I never had to think twice about them - I knew they would be there and at any moment she could kiss me, I loved her kisses just as much.

For me with Zachary the fact that he, just now, at 22 months 1 week old is just starting to be able to kiss me melts my heart. I also have no idea if this is something he will be able to continue doing, or if it will stop.

Which brings me to today...I asked for a kiss and Zachary looked at me, tried to make his mouth move and couldn't -- this time he didn't give up, he tried, tried with all of his might. It took a couple minutes - I had just about given up, from watching the struggle on his face -- mommy needs to learn - NEVER give up! Zach did it!!!! He came up to me threw his arms around my neck squeezed and kissed my cheek. Zachary was all smiles as he ran away from me trying to find Zoe and Mommy was all smiles with a tear running down her cheek where he had just kissed it.